PowerPop... An Eclectic Collection of Pop Culture

Comedian Quotes V

I’ll start off with two talk show hosts going first. Carson, still is probably the most popular of them all. Cavett was great at what he did… he was funny but most of all he had conversations with his guests rather than interviewing them.

This will be the end of the Comedian Quotes…I thank all of you who have read and enjoyed them…also thanks for all of the suggestions.

Comedian Quotes
Comedian Quotes II
Comedian Quotes III
Comedian Quotes IV

Dick Cavett

I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you’re hungry for power

If your parents never had children, chances are… neither will you

Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself

I don’t see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty – and evaporating quickly

I would not ever try to be a show intellectual, which I was accused of doing a while on ABC. I thought you were supposed to read the guests’ books

I don’t feel old. I feel like a young man that has something wrong with him

Johnny Carson

I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself

People will pay more to be entertained than educated

Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do

I hated my last boss. He asked, Why are you two hours late? I said, I fell downstairs. He said, That doesn’t take two hours

Some sad news from Australia… the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today

Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die

May you have the income of a Republican and the sex life of a Democrat!

Bill Burr

God’s everywhere, but I gotta go down (to church) to see him? Really? And he’s mad at me down there, and I owe you money?”

Deny your emotions and act like you have answers

You’re a kid, your whole life is awesome. It’s awesome, right? You had no money, no ID, no cell phone, no nothing, no keys to the house. You just ran outside into the woods. You weren’t scared of nothing. I challenge you to do that as an adult. All your IDs, all your credit cards – just run out of the house with no phone, turn the corner where you can’t see your house, and not have a full on panic attack

I gotta be honest with you. Im kind of jealous of the way my dad gets to talk to my mom sometimes. Where are all those old-school women you can just take your day out on? When did they stop making those angels?

People focus too much on whether there’s a Democrat or a Republican in office. It’s not like this guy Kim-Jong Un got into power the second Trump got into power. It’s not like he wasn’t a problem. It’s not like we haven’t had warmongers. It’s not like corporations haven’t been the main influence on what we’re doing around the world.

I can’t quite remember who I voted for president. It wasn’t Trump or Hillary, though. I didn’t like either one of them

Chris Rock

There are only three things that women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

Every man has to settle down eventually. You know why you gotta settle down eventually? Because you don’t want to be the old guy in the club.

Oprah is rich, Bill Gates is wealthy. If Bill Gates woke up tomorrow with Oprah’s money, he’d jump out a f***ing window and slit his throat on the way down saying, ‘I can’t even put gas in my plane!’

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn’t have any innocent bystanders.

Comedy is the blues for people who can’t sing.

People are always going to, you know, find something wrong with people who are not the exact same as them. That’s just what it is. Black, white, short, tall, religions, whatever. People are bad.

Jim Gaffigan

You wanna know how good bacon is? To improve other food, they wrap it in bacon.”

Whenever you correct someone’s grammar just remember that nobody likes you

There should be a children’s song: ‘If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself and let your dad sleep

Isn’t it strange — when you’re single, all you see is couples, and when you’re part of a couple, all you see are hookers

Babies and toddlers are mostly what I’ve been exposed to at this point. I’m hoping parenting just gets much easier after this. It does, right?

Anyone know if the shuttles to Hell will have Wifi? Asking for a friend

Bob Saget

Beautiful clear day in Beverly Hills. The sweet smell of Botox is in the air.

My confidence wavers between being genuine and being insecure.

I’m going to be fifty this year. Soon I’m going to meet somebody around my own age, and she’s going to be smart and beautiful, and I’m going to date her daughter.

When you’re famous, you’re always famous. It doesn’t go away.
Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.

My dad’s like, “If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?”

Steve Allen

Radio is the theater of the mind; television is the theater of the mindless

Physical fitness is in. I recently had a physical fit myself

Thousands of years ago only Christ could walk on the water. Today anybody can do it; you just step on the garbage

Civilization itself . . . can easily be swept aside when mob passions are aroused

Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots

In a rational society we would want our presidents to be teachers. In our actual society we insist they be cheerleaders

Joey Bishop

The other day I started to take a course in psycho-ceramics. What is psycho-ceramics? It’s the study of crackpots

“Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.

There are many things that I find attractive about a woman. Foremost to me, of course, would be a sense of humor-but that doesn’t come in a bottle

A woman driver went through a red light. The cop stopped her and said, Lady, didn’t you see that red light? The woman said, You’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all

Twilight Zone – A Short Drink from a Certain Fountain

★★★1/2 December 13, 1963 Season 5 Episode 11

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

This one dishes out some Twilight Zone poetic justice to one of the characters. Patrick O’Neal plays Harmon Gordon who marries a much younger woman and then fails to keep up with her. He seeks an experimental serum from his brother Raymond that Raymond is heistant to give him. The serum is designed to make people younger but it has not been tested enough.

Ruta Lee plays Flora Gordon and it’s clear that why she married Harmon. Harmon acts blind to the way Flora treats him but Raymond sees through the situation. I don’t feel a lot of sympathy for Harmon because he had to know what he was geting himself into. The ending is a twist that I didn’t see coming the first time I watched it.

It’s not in the upper class of the Twilight Zone but not a bad one to watch.

From IMDB:

Until episodes became available on VHS and DVD, this was one of four “lost” episodes of The Twilight Zone (1959) that were not included with syndication packages during the 1960s through the 1980s. The other three were The Twilight Zone: Miniature (1963), The Twilight Zone: Sounds and Silences (1964), and The Twilight Zone: The Encounter (1964). This episode, “Miniature,” and “Sounds and Silences” were excluded from the package because of lawsuits that had been filed claiming those episodes were plagiarized. “The Encounter” had drawn complaints of anti-Japanese prejudice and epithets expressed by one of the characters. The episodes were finally re-released for broadcast television in a 1983 special hosted by Patrick O’Neal, the lead actor of “Fountain”.

This show was written by Rod Serling and Lou Holtz

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

Picture of an aging man who leads his life, as Thoreau said, ‘in quiet desperation.’ Because Harmon Gordon is enslaved by a love affair with a wife forty years his junior. Because of this, he runs when he should walk. He surrenders when simple pride dictates a stand. He pines away for the lost morning of his life when he should be enjoying the evening. In short, Mr. Harmon Gordon seeks a fountain of youth, and who’s to say he won’t find it? This happens to be the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Harmon Gordon is now quite elderly but is married to Flora, an attractive woman some 40 years younger than him. She’s something of a gold digger and is now quite bored with her marriage. Harmon turns to his younger brother Raymond, a medical doctor who has been experimenting with cellular regeneration. Raymond’s experiments to date have been on lab animals and he’s reluctant to help Harmon as he has no idea what effect his youth serum might have on him. In the end, he administers his serum and by the next day Harmon is a new man, so to speak.

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

8 minute preview from Dailymotion

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

It happens to be a fact: as one gets older, one does get wiser. If you don’t believe it, ask Flora. Ask her any day of the ensuing weeks of her life, as she takes notes during the coming years and realizes that the worm has turned: youth has taken over. It’s simply the way the calendar crumbles…in the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Patrick O’Neal…Harmon Gordon
Ruta Lee…Flora Gordon
Walter Brooke … Dr. Raymond Gordon

John Fogerty – Jambalaya (On The Bayou)

In the 90s our band would play this live. It was close to this version but when that second verse kicked in… we really kicked in full blast. A drunken patron at a bar once told me during a break…that it sounded great… like Hank Williams with 5 lines of blow. That made me smile anyway.

Hank Williams wrote this song and originally recorded it in 1952. Williams’ original peaked at #1 in the Country charts and also went to #20 on the US pop charts. Other artists to record this include Jo Stafford, Fats Domino, Brenda Lee and The Carpenters.

John Fogerty released the Blue Ridge Rangers album in 1973. This was his debut solo album after Creedence Clearwater Revival broke up. Some songs were written by country legends like Jimmie Rodgers and Hank Williams; some are traditional numbers, adapted by Fogerty in the style of those artists.

This was a one man album. Fogerty played every instrument himself. It was a risky move releasing a country cover album in the early seventies. He wanted to distance himself from CCR. While it wasn’t a large hit, it wasn’t a disaster considering what it was. The album peaked at #47 in the Billboard Album Charts and #59 in Canada in 1973.

Jambalaya (On The Bayou)

Goodbye, Joe, me gotta go, me oh my oh.
Me gotta go, pole the pirogue down the bayou.
My Yvonne, sweetest one, me oh my oh.
Son of a gun, gonna have big fun on the bayou.

[CHORUS:]
Jambalaya and a crawfish pie and fillet gumbo
‘Cause tonight I’m gonna see my ma cher amio.
Pick guitar, fill fruit jar and be gayo,
Son of a gun, gonna have big fun on the bayou.

Thibodeaux, Fontaineaux, the place is buzzin’,
Kinfolk come to see Yvonne by the dozen.
Dress in style, go hog wild, and be gayo.
Son of a gun, gonna have big fun on the bayou.

[CHORUS:]
Oh, guitar!

[CHORUS]

Oh, Lord!
Hang tight, ooh Lord!
Ah, take it out.
He’s comin’, ah!

….

Queen – Killer Queen

This is one of the first Queen songs I heard. I saw Queen’s popularity in America peak in with The Game. You couldn’t go anywhere without hearing Another One Bites the Dust. After that album, I didn’t hear as much from there here. Now they are peaking again after the Bohemian Rhapsody movie.

The first single from Queen’s third album, Sheer Heart Attack was released in 1974. The song peaked at #12 in the Billboard 100, #2 in the UK, #15 in Canada.

Killer Queen was their first song to chart outside their native UK, where “Seven Seas of Rhye,” from their previous album Queen II. Their breakthrough to superstardom came with their next album, A Night At The Opera, which has the epic Bohemian Rhapsody.

The Sheer Heart Attack album cover was shot by Mick Rock, who did the famous cover of their previous album, Queen II. Freddie Mercury typically drove the visual direction of the band, but it was drummer Roger Taylor who came up with the concept for the Sheer Heart Attack cover.

Roger Taylor wanted them to look like they had been thrown up from a shipwreck on some distant shore,’ so that’s what ick Rock shot. He said they were soaking wet with a lot of spraying going on.

Freddie Mercury : “It’s about a high class call girl. I’m trying to say that classy people can be whores as well. That’s what the song is about, though I’d prefer people to put their interpretation upon it – to read into it what they like.”

Brian May: “This is a perfect pop record and one of Freddie’s greatest songs. It’s beautifully constructed and it’s also got one of the solos I’m most proud of.”
“Every slice of that record is pure pop perfection. Little things that visit once and come again, like the little bell in the second verse.”

From Songfacts

Regarding the line, “‘Let them eat cake’ she says, just like Marie Antoinette,” according to legend, Marie Antoinette (the Queen of France) said “Let them eat cake” after hearing how the peasants had no bread to eat. It’s more likely that the phrase was uttered by a French philosopher, not Antoinette.

The Marie Antoinette quote has gone down in history as justification for the French Revolution. It demonstrates how out of touch with the common folk the ruling class had become. According to legend, when informed that there was no bread for the people to eat, she replied, oblivious, “then let them eat cake!” It is said, that enraged by this incredibly ignorant response, the people revolted. In the song, it is used to demonstrate at what level this high priced prostitute sells her wares.

This was one of the first songs recorded at The Quadrangle, a studio opened at the Rockfield Studios complex in Wales in 1973. The following year, Queen recorded much of their Sheer Heart Attack album at Rockfield, and in 1975 they did the bulk of “Bohemian Rhapsody” there.

In Ben Elton’s musical We Will Rock You, Killer Queen is an evil matriarch who controls the music industry.
Nevertheless, he was a little reticent at first about releasing it: “I was a little hesitant; I was thinking are we setting ourselves as something very light?” He relates this back to how initially the band were very heavy and rock-orientated, and “Killer Queen” was a major departure from that sound.

Californian pop princess Katy Perry named one of her fragrances after this tune. She told Women’s Wear Daily the song’s lyrics really spoke to her when she was a teenager. “Killer Queen has been in my vocabulary since I was 15,” Perry said. “Freddie Mercury painted the lyrics of this woman who I wanted to be. She seemed very powerful, and she captivated a room when she walked in.”

This song was covered by Sum 41 for the 2005 Queen tribute album Killer Queen.

In the video game Guitar Hero 3, one of the unlockable guitars called the “Card Sharp Special” can have a finish called “Killer Queen.” In the description it says: ” Something about dynamite and laser beams? what’s that all about? and who am I to deny it?”, which is a reference to the song lyrics.

Killer Queen

She keeps her Moet et Chandon
In her pretty cabinet
“Let them eat cake”, she says
Just like Marie Antoinette
A built-in remedy
For Kruschev and Kennedy
At anytime an invitation
You can’t decline

Caviar and cigarettes
Well versed in etiquette
Extraordinarily nice

She’s a Killer Queen
Gunpowder, gelatine
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
Anytime

Recommended at the price
Insatiable an appetite
Wanna try?

To avoid complications
She never kept the same address
In conversation
She spoke just like a baroness
Met a man from China
Went down to Geisha Minah
Then again incidentally
If you’re that way inclined

Perfume came naturally from Paris (naturally)
For cars she couldn’t care less
Fastidious and precise

She’s a Killer Queen
Gunpowder, gelatine
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
Anytime

Drop of a hat she’s as willing as
Playful as a pussy cat
Then momentarily out of action
Temporarily out of gas
To absolutely drive you wild, wild
She’s all out to get you

She’s a Killer Queen
Gunpowder, gelatine
Dynamite with a laser beam
Guaranteed to blow your mind
Anytime

Recommended at the price
Insatiable an appetite
Wanna try?
You wanna try

Nazareth – Love Hurts

I owned Nazareth’s Hair of the Dog on 8-track tape (a book about 8-tracks from Deke) that was given to me as a kid. I still remember that CLICK during the title song. I expect to hear it when I listen to it today. The only version I knew of Love Hurts was Nazareth for the longest time. Later I found out it has been covered by many people including The Everly Brothers.

I saw Nazareth in the early 80s. Dan McCafferty’s voice was rough, loud, and great. Instead of talking to the audience he screamed through a very hot mic…but they were awesome. The opened up for Billy Squire but I would have loved to seem them headline.

The album this song was on was Hair of the Dog. It would be Nazareth’s biggest album. The album peaked at #17 in the Billboard Album Charts and #20 in Canada in 1975.

Nazareth released Love Hurts as a single late in 1974. Surprisingly, it tanked, but in April 1975 it became a hit in South Africa, prompting their label, A&M, to release it in America. It took a while, but radio stations in Texas started playing the song, and others around the country gradually followed suit.

The song peaked at #1 in Canada and #8 in the Billboard 100 and #41 in the UK. Nazareth got their name from the first line of the Band’s “The Weight” – “I pulled into Nazareth…”

The Everly Brothers may have been the first to cover it, but they never released the song as a single. They planned to release this as a single, but industry politics got in the way. The group was managed by Wesley Rose, who was part owner of the publishing company Acuff-Rose. After a string of hits for Cadence Records, they left for Warner Bros. in 1960, and continued to make hits but Rose wanted them to release singles for which Acuff-Rose owned the publishing, and when the duo recorded covers of “Lucille” and “Temptation” (a song from 1933), he protested, leading to a split and a legal dispute. Rose had another one of his clients, Roy Orbison, record “Love Hurts” and released it as the B-side to his #1 hit “Running Scared” in 1961.

Don Everly: “Wesley covered us with Roy Orbison, which was outlandishly selfish,” Don Everly said in Walk Right Back: The Everly Brothers On Warner Bros. “The arrangement was ours, and it was written for us. We couldn’t release it as a single because we didn’t know if Acuff-Rose would license it or not because we were in a lawsuit with them. It got that bitter.”

Pete Aginew Nazareth bassist: “We all loved the song. We often covered songs that we liked that we used to listen to on tape. Every now and then, we’d just go back and try to do something with one of these things. If you could change it and make it yours, we’d do it in the studio and see if we could do something about it. When we did Love Hurts, I believe there were 42 different versions recorded of it. The one we used to listen to was Gram Parsons and Emmylou Harris, off the “Grievous Angel” [1974] album. We used to have that in our van and we loved the song. […] We recorded “Love Hurts” as a b-side and that’s how we saw it. Of course, when I hear it now, it’s probably one of the best rock ballads of all time and definitely the vocal is in the top three.”

From Songfacts

Nazareth made this song a hit, but it was originally released by the Everly Brothers on their 1960 album A Date With The Everly Brothers. Like their heartbreak hit from 1957, “Bye Bye Love,” it was written by Boudleaux Bryant.

Young love is hot with passion, but it burns you when it’s hot. The guy in this song has just made this discovery, which is a revelation of sorts – all those singing the praises of love are fools who will soon be burned, as love is just a lie made to make you blue.

The original Everly Brothers version runs 2:23 and is delivered in their distinctive, pleasing harmonies. The Nazareth version is 3:03, with sandpaper vocals by lead singer Dan McCafferty screamed out as if he’s falling into the pit of despair.

The group is from Scotland and had three UK hits under their belts when
Nazareth’s Stateside success was short lived: “Holiday” reached #87 in 1980, and “Love Leads To Madness” went to #105 in 1982, but none of their other songs charted there.

The album version runs 3:52, with a guitar solo by Manny Charlton that is not on the 3:03 single.

By the time Nazareth brought this song to life, the Everly Brothers had been split for three years. When they re-formed in 1983, they added the song to their setlists for the first time, starting with their reunion concert at Royal Albert Hall, which was released as a live album. In later years, it sometimes seemed like they were singing it to each other on stage, as their relationship had clearly soured.

The Everly Brothers recorded a new version on their 1965 album Rock’n Soul. Other artists to release it include Ray Peterson, Jimmy Webb, and Gram Parsons with Emmylou Harris. Jim Capaldi is the only other artist to chart with the song; he took it to #97 US in December 1975.

***A Real 8-Track Museum in Dallas Texas***

Love Hurts

Love hurts

Love scars

Love wounds and marks

Any heart not tough or strong enough

To take a lot of pain, take a lot of pain

Love is like a cloud, it holds a lot of rain

Love hurts

Ooh love hurts

I’m young

I know

But even so

I know a thing or two, I learned from you

I really learned a lot, really learned a lot

Love is like a flame, it burns you when it’s hot

Love hurts

Ooh love hurts

Some fools think

Of happiness, blissfulness, togetherness

Some fools fool themselves, I guess

They’re not foolin’ me

I know it isn’t true I know it isn’t true

Love is just a lie made to make you blue

Love hurts

Ooh love hurts

I know it isn’t true

Love is just a lie made to make you blue

Love hurts

Ooh love hurts

Ooh, love hurts, ooh

…

Twilight Zone – The 7th is Made Up of Phantoms

★★★★ December 6, Season 5 Episode 10

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

I like this one a lot. You learn some history and enjoy some Time Travel. Warren Oates, Randy Boone, and Ron Foster play three National Guardsmen on war game maneuvers on June 25th, 1964, near the Little Big Horn battlefield where, in 1876, General Custer held his famous last stand with the 7th cavalry against an army of Sioux, which led to their massacre. They find a canteen that appears brand new…but it was from 100 years ago.

As for the characters…There’s the true believer, the sergeant, who seems to have an unbelievably detailed knowledge of the historical event and the greenhorn kid. They all play their parts well. You will not see a lot of locations in this episode but you see the characters, even the skeptic, turn true into believers.

If I would have graded this on a personal scale…it would be a 5. I’m not sure it would be that for everyone. The funny thing is…the 5th season had some known classics and a few not graded so high. Two of those (near the ned) are two of my favorites but I try to grade this more on a masses scale when possible. The 5th season was a roller coaster.

From IMDB Trivia

The tank used is an M3A3 Stuart light tank.

Captain William Benteen, who is mentioned several times, previously served as the namesake of James Whitmore’s character in The Twilight Zone: On Thursday We Leave for Home (1963).

This episode takes place on June 25, 1876 and June 25, 1964.

The Battle of Little Bighorn occurred June 25-26, 1876 near Crow Agency, in Bighorn County, Montana. This is in the south central part of the state of Montana.

This show was written by Rod Serling

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

June twenty-fifth 1964—or, if you prefer, June twenty-fifth 1876. The cast of characters in order of their appearance: a patrol of General Custer’s cavalry and a patrol of National Guardsmen on a maneuver. Past and present are about to collide head-on, as they are wont to do in a very special bivouac area known as….the Twilight Zone.

Summary

A National Guard tank crew on war games suddenly find themselves back in time to June 25, 1876, the day General Custer fought and lost to the Sioux at the battle of the Little Big Horn. They report what they’ve seen and heard but the officer-in-charge is more than a little dubious about what they claim. They return to the area, and when the attack begins, they join the fight. When the commander goes to locate them, he finds something else entirely.

***Before you watch this…they had a bit of fun beeping words to make it sound bad. It is funny I will admit. This is the only one I could find that is not a drawn out review…like the one you are reading!***

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Sergeant William Connors, Trooper Michael McCluskey, and Trooper Richard Langsford, who, on a hot afternoon in June, made a charge over a hill—and never returned. Look for this one under ‘P’ for phantom, in a historical ledger located in a reading room known as the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Ron Foster…Sgt. William Connors
Randy Boone…Pvt. Michael McCluskey
Warren Oates…Cpl. Richard Langsford
Greg Morris…Lieutenant Woodard
Jeffrey Morris…Finnigan
Wayne Mallory…Scout
Robert Bray…Captain Dennet
Lew Brown…Sergeant
Jacques Shelton…Corporal

Warren Zevon – Poor Poor Pitiful Me

I love this song. Not many songs deal with a failed suicide, domestic abuse, and a brush with sadomasochism. I’m a huge Warren Zevon fan. His songs tend to be on the dark side…and anyone who has listened to Excitable Boy will testify to that.

When I heard Zevon’s version of this song for the first time I was sold. I first heard the Linda Ronstadt version and I loved it. I’m a Linda Ronstadt fan but something about Zevon’s version draws me in. It’s raw and crude and I love the way he sings it.

Zevon wrote and recorded the song and it appeared on his self-titled album in 1976. It became a hit when Linda Ronstadt covered it the next year. She cleaned up the song a little. Ronstadt’s cover was a cleaned-up version with the gender reversed. Still, her character fails at suicide, but the S&M (sadomasochism) references are gone.

Like other Zevon songs this is a pretty crude and risqué song. His character is such a disaster that he can’t even kill himself: he puts his head on the railroad tracks, but the train doesn’t run anymore.

I met a girl at the rainbow bar
She asked me if I’d beat her
She took me back to the hired house
I don’t wanna talk about it, hut

It’s thought that the song was a friendly swipe at Jackson Browne, whose songs such as “Here Come Those Tears Again” and “Sleep’s Dark and Silent Gate” from The Pretender could be quite dark. The album was produced by Jackson Browne and had backing vocals by Lindsey Buckingham.

Another hit cover version of the song was recorded by Canadian country singer Terri Clark in 1996. It peaked at #1 in the Canadian Country Charts and #5 in the Billboard Country Charts.

Poor Poor Pitiful Me

I lay my head on the railroad tracks
I’m waiting on the double E
The railroad don’t run no more
Poor poor pitiful me

Poor poor pitiful me and poor poor pitiful me
These young girls won’t let me be
Lord have mercy on me, woe is me

Well I met a girl in West Hollywood
Well I ain’t naming names
But she really worked me over good
She was just like Jesse James

She really worked me over good
She was a credit to her gender
She put me through some changes Lord
Sort of like a waring blender

Poor poor pitiful me, poor poor pitiful me
These young girls won’t let me be
Lord have mercy on me, woe is me

Poor poor pitiful me and poor poor pitiful me
Oh these girls won’t let me be
Lord have mercy on me, woe is me

I met a girl at the rainbow bar
She asked me if I’d beat her
She took me back to the hired house
I don’t wanna talk about it, hut

Poor poor pitiful me
Poor poor pitiful me
Hut, never mind
Poor poor pitiful me
Yeah poor poor pitiful me

Twilight Zone – Probe 7, Over and Out

★★★★1/2 November 29, 1963 Season 5 Episode 9

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

Probe 7, Over and Out sets up a situation filled with a number of dramatic possibilities. This is an episode that could have been an hour long to explore more avenues. It reminds me of the episode Two but goes a different route. The acting in this one is very good as always. Richard Basehart plays Colonel Adam Cook who just crash landed on a planet. His ship is beyond repair, and he doesn’t have hope his home planet will help him. He does have communication with his General back home but the General has bad news of a Nuclear war coming.

There will be no help for Colonel Adam, but he has a new world to explore. He meets up with Antoinette Bower who plays Norda. Norda is also stranded on this planet. There is a language and personality barrier that they will have to cross. It’s a good Twilight Zone that could have been better with a little more exploration.

From IMDB Trivia

Norda refers to the apples as “seppla,” which is an anagram of “apples.”

This was the first episode of the series to air since The Twilight Zone: Uncle Simon (1963) two weeks earlier. The Twilight Zone: Night Call (1964) was to have been shown on November 22, 1963, but the broadcast was canceled due to the assassination of US President John F. Kennedy in Dallas, Texas that day. It was eventually shown on February 7, 1964.

Much, if not all, of Norda’s language is simply backwards-English. For example, “em” for “me” and “ouy” for “you”

This show was written by Rod Serling

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

One Colonel Cook, a traveler in space. He’s landed on a remote planet several million miles from his point of departure. He can make an inventory of his plight by just one 360-degree movement of head and eyes. Colonel Cook has been set adrift in an ocean of space in a metal lifeboat that has been scorched and destroyed and will never fly again. He survived the crash but his ordeal is yet to begin. Now he must give battle to loneliness. Now Colonel Cook must meet the unknown. It’s a small planet set deep in space. But for Colonel Cook, it’s the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Astronaut Adam Cook crash lands on an Earth-like planet several light-years away. His ship is badly damaged and beyond repair. He manages to contact his home base but they have little encouragement for him. They don’t have a replacement spacecraft to rescue him and the security situation is such that they may soon be at war. Cook readies himself to make a home on his new world when he discovers another inhabitant, a human-like female from another world. As they learn to communicate, he learns her name is Eve Norda and together set off to begin a new life

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Do you know these people? Names familiar, are they? They lived a long time ago. Perhaps they’re part fable, perhaps they’re part fantasy. And perhaps the place they’re walking to now is not really called ‘Eden.’ We offer it only as a presumption. This has been the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Richard Basehart…Colonel Adam Cook
Antoinette Bower…Eve Norda
Harold Gould: General Larrabee
Barton Heyman: Lieutenant Blane

Beatles – One After 909

A pure rock and roll song by The Beatles. It’s always a joy to listen to because it goes back to their roots They played this song live in the early days before Beatlemania. When they recorded the final version on the roof you could see they were having a good time. George’s guitar playing on this is perfect.

A song that was recorded in January of 1969 but was written by John and Paul in the 1950s. Being a very early attempt at songwriting, John Lennon reluctantly brought it forward for The Beatles to record when they were looking for new material in early 1963. They recorded it but didn’t have a take that they liked.

In 1969 John pulled out “One After 909” from his memory and presented it again. On this occasion, it was reworked with enthusiasm and with a different feel and arrangement, the result becoming a cool presentation of early Beatlemania at their final live performance on the rooftop in 1969.

John, Paul, and George were talking about the song and John said he always wanted to change the words. Paul said no…it’s great like it is so they played the song on the rooftop. It would be included on the Let It Be album released in 1970

The song was about a lady who tells her boyfriend she is leaving on the train that leaves after train number 909. He begs her not to go, but she does anyway. He packs his bags and rushes after her and discovers that she is not on “the one after 909,” so he goes home depressed and goes into the wrong house.

John Lennon: “I wrote it when I was about seventeen, either right before or after ‘Hello Little Girl,’ and it was resurrected for (the ‘Let It Be’) album, probably for lack of material. Nine has always been around. I’m not sure why. I was born on the ninth of October, I lived at nine Newcastle Road, ‘Revolution 9.’ Numerologically, I’m apparently a number three or six, so I’m not sure where the nine comes from…but it’s all part of nine.”

Paul McCartney: “It was a number we didn’t used to do much but it was one that we always liked doing, and we rediscovered it. There were a couple of tunes that we wondered why we never put out; either George Martin didn’t like them enough to or he favored others. It’s not a great song but it’s a great favorite of mine because it has great memories for me of John and I trying to write a bluesy freight-train song. There were a lot of those songs at the time, like ‘Midnight Special,’ ‘Freight Train,’ ‘Rock Island Line,’ so this was the ‘One After 909.’ She didn’t get the 909, she got the one after it! It was a tribute to British Rail, actually. No, at the time we weren’t think British, it was much more the Super Chief from Omaha.”

One After 909

My baby said she’s trav’ling on the one after 909
I said move over honey I’m traveling on that line
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don’t be cold as ice.
Said she’s trav’ling on the one after 909.

I begged her not to go and I begged her on my bended knees,
You’re only fooling around, you’re fooling around with me.
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don’t be cold as ice.
Said she’s trav’ling on the one after 909.

I got my bag, run to the station
Railman says you’ve got the the wrong location
I got my bag, run right home
Then I find I’ve got the number wrong

Well she said she’s trav’ling on the one after 909
I said move over honey I’m traveling on that line
I said move over once, move over twice
Come on baby don’t be cold as ice.
Said she’s trav’ling on the one after 909.

I got my bag, run to the station
Railman says you’ve got the the wrong location
I got my bag, run right home
Then I find I’ve got the number wrong

AC/DC – Jailbreak

Bon Scott was reading a story in the paper about Mark Brandon Reid…otherwise known as Chopper Reid. Chopper was sent to jail for 16 years for murdering a gang leader. After a while, he got fed up with jail life, so a criminal friend of his named Jimmy Loughnan planned an escape. It didn’t go well because of Chopper’s fear of tight places…and he and Jimmy were caught.

Bon Scott and Angus and Malcolm Young wrote Jailbreak. The song peaked at #10 in Australia in 1976. The song appeared on the Australian version of Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap. The song would not be released to the rest of the world until the 1984 international release of the ‘74 Jailbreak EP.

Mark Evans plays bass on this track and album. Evans would play on one more album, Let There Be Rock, and then he would be replaced by Cliff Williams on the Powerage album. Williams remains with ACDC to this day.

They made two videos for this song, one of them playing on a bunch of rocks as various explosions go on around them and the other which features the band simply playing on a stage.

In the bottom video Bon Scott and Phil Rudd (shirts with arrows) were dressed in blue prisoner uniforms while Malcolm Young and Mark Evans wore guard uniforms.

Jailbreak

There was a friend of mine on murder
And the judge’s gavel fell
Jury found him guilty
Gave him sixteen years in hell
He said “I ain’t spending my life here
I ain’t livin’ alone
Ain’t breakin’ no rocks on the chain gang
I’m breakin’ out and heading home”
Gonna make a (jailbreak)
And I’m looking towards the sky
I’m gonna make a (jailbreak)
Oh, how I wish that I could fly

All in the name of liberty
All in the name of liberty
Got to be free

(Jailbreak)
Let me outta here
(Jailbreak)
Sixteen years
(Jailbreak)
Had more than I can take
(Jailbreak)

Yeah

He said he’d seen his lady being fooled with
By another man
She was down and he was up
Had a gun in his hand
Bullets started flying everywhere
People start to scream
Big man lyin’ on the ground
With a hole in his body where his life had been

But it was all in the name of liberty
All in the name of liberty
I got to be free

(Jailbreak)
(Jailbreak)
I got to break out
Out of here

Heartbeats
They were racing
Freedom
He was chasin’
Spotlights
Sirens
Rifles firing
But he made it out

With a bullet in his back

Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak
Jailbreak

Comedian Quotes IV

Some more comedians this week and next week we will be wrapping this up. Thank you for the suggestions…some will appear next week including my favorite talk show host.

Robin Williams

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the South? Nothing! Someone’s losing a trailer, number one

Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you’re making too much money

Marriage is a triumph of imagination over intelligence

A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while

The only reason Mickey Mouse has four fingers is that he can’t pick up a check

Being a famous print journalist is like being the best-dressed woman on the radio

Death is nature’s way of saying, ‘Your table is ready

People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the white house

Robert Klein

In the fifties I had dreams about touching a naked woman and she would turn to bronze or the dream about hot dogs chasing donuts through the Lincoln Tunnel.

And the only studies were – Rodney Dangerfield was my mentor and he was my Yale drama school for comedy.

Fear is the greatest salesman.

In the book of things people more often do wrong than right, investing must certainly top the list, followed closely by wallpapering and eating artichokes

Comedy is still alive, and there are still funny people. Jews are still overrepresented in comedy and psychiatry and underrepresented in the priesthood. That immigrant Jewish humor is still with us.

I learned more at The Second City than I did at Yale for all that high tuition.

Jerry Seinfeld

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.”

There [are] just two things I’d need to find out everything I want to know about everyone: 1) Let me see them drive; 2) let me hear them talk about marriage … That’s going to tell me exactly your relationship to the world.

The IRS! They’re like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV

If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success

Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you’re comfortable with

What’s the deal with Ovaltine? It comes in a round container, you put it in a round glass, why don’t they call it Roundtine?

Dave Allen

If it’s sent by ship then it’s a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment.

We spend our lives on the run: we get up by the clock, eat and sleep by the clock, get up again, go to work – and then we retire. And what do they give us? A bloody clock.

My church accepts all denominations – fivers, tenners, twenties.

Am I the Irish comedian with half a finger? No, I’m the Irish comedian with nine and a half fingers.

I don’t go out of my way to be outrageous, I just go out of my way to look at things.

Brother Dave Gardner

The South may not always be right, but by God it’s never wrong!

Rock music sounds like an octopus making love to a bagpipe

Let them that don’t want none have memories of not gettin’ any

Love your enemies and drive them nuts

Peter Cook

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly

As I looked out into the night sky, across all those infinite stars, it made me realize how insignificant they are.

You realize that suicide’s a criminal offense. In less enlightened times they’d have hung you for it.

Everything I’ve ever told you, including this, is a lie

Dudley Moore

I’m always looking for meaningful one-night stands

Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we’re not poets

When I think of Canada I think of tonic water.

Masturbation is always very safe. You not only control the person you’re with, but you can leave when you want to

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it

Twilight Zone – Uncle Simon

★★★1/2 November 15, 1963 Season 5 Episode 8

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

This is not a top drawer Twilight Zone episode. On the surface… the problem is no relatable character and absolutely no sympathy. Uncle Simon is a sick, mean, and vindictive old man. He was being cared for by Constance Ford who plays Barbara Polk. Uncle Simon is quite mean to Barbara but she stayed for 25 years putting up with it. You have to wonder why Barbara is still there taking his abuse for years. As you watch you start finding out why.

Its a sad story about two sad people, both of whom make it a point to say everything thats on their mind but by this point. Uncle Simon tells Barbara at one point “You are the only woman I know who looks as if, underneath her clothes, she wore clothes.” That perfectly described the bland Barbara. I wanted so much to feel pity for Barbara…and in some ways I do but her reasons for being there are to inherit the mansion and money. You just get the feeling she wasn’t there for the right reasons.

There is one bright spot. Robby the Robot makes an appearance in this one. Robby has 30 screen credits from 1956 Forbidden Planet to 2014’s The Big Bang Theory.

From IMDB:

The Twilight Zone: Probe 7, Over and Out (1963), the next episode of The Twilight Zone (1959), would not air for two weeks. The broadcast of the following week’s episode on November 22, 1963, which was to have been The Twilight Zone: Night Call (1964), was canceled due to the assassination of U.S. President John F. Kennedy in Dallas, Texas that day.

Robby the Robot from Forbidden Planet (1956) is used in this episode. However, the dome portion of his head has been altered. This is one of many instalments to use props from “Forbidden Planet”, since the series was frequently filmed at MGM, which kept the film props in use for many years.

This show was written by Rod Serling

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

Dramatis personae: Mr. Simon Polk, a gentleman who has lived out his life in a gleeful rage; and the young lady who’s just beat the hasty retreat is Mr. Polk’s niece, Barbara. She has lived her life as if during each ensuing hour she had a dentist appointment. There is yet a third member of the company soon to be seen. He now resides in the laboratory and he is the kind of character to be found only in the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Barbara Polk takes care of her elderly and mean-spirited uncle Simon. He is a scientist who spends much of his time in his basement laboratory but when he’s not there, he seems to take great pleasure in demeaning his niece. She can’t wait for him to die and doesn’t hesitate to tell him so. When he does die, things are… not quite what she expected.

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Dramatis personae, a metal man who’ll go by the name of Simon, whose life as well as his body has been stamped out for him; and the woman who tends to him, the lady Barbara, who’s discovered belatedly that all bad things don’t come to an end, and that once a bed is made, it’s quite necessary that you sleep in it. Tonight’s uncomfortable little exercise in avarice and automatons, from the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Cedric Hardwicke … Uncle Simon
Constance Ford … Barbara Polk
Ian Wolfe … Schwimmer
Robby the Robot … Robotic Uncle Simon

Rolling Stones – Ain’t Too Proud To Beg

If I had to pick my favorite Stones song they covered…this one would be high up there. I like the intro and Keith’s sloppy guitar solo that was perfect for it.

The Stones covered this song in 1974 on the It’s Only Rock ‘n’ Roll album. Later in 1978 they would cover another Temptations song called Just My Imagination.

The Stones originally planned for Dobie Gray’s “Drift Away” as the only cover song on It’s Only Rock ‘n’ Roll, but they bumped it for this. Billy Preston plays the funky piano on this song, and it really makes it.

It’s Only Rock and Roll would be the last album that Mick Taylor worked on. Ron Wood would eventually replace him on guitar. Wood probably fit in with the Stones more than Taylor…but Taylor had a sound that was never replicated again. The albums he played on are considered to be the Stones best.

This was written by Motown writers Norman Whitfield and Eddie Holland. Holland, who was part of the Holland/Dozier/Holland writing team, wrote the lyrics. The Temptations version peaked at #13.

Other covers of this song include Phil Collins, TLC, and the one and only Rick Astley… whom the Internet’s never going to give up..

The song peaked at #17 in the Billboard 100 and #14 in Canada in 1974.

Paul McCartney: “There were two songs I turned Mick onto that the Stones have done. One was She Said Yeah and the other was Ain’t Too Proud To Beg. Mick would deny it – ‘Wot? Never saw him, never met him’ – but I distinctly remember having him up into a little music room and playing it to him. He loved it and he went and did it. We’ve messed around with the track a little bit, but it is sort of like my memory of the original.”

Ain’t Too Proud To Beg

I know you wanna leave me,
But I refuse to let you go,
If I have to beg, plead for your sympathy,
I don’t mind ’cause you mean that much to me.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Now I’ve heard a cryin’ man
Is half a man with no sense of pride,
But if I have to cry to keep you,
I don’t mind weepin’ if it’ll keep you by my side.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

If I have to sleep on your doorstep all night and day
Just to keep you from walking away,
Let your friends laugh, even this I can stand,
’cause I wanna keep you any way I can.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Now I’ve got a love so deep in the pit of my heart,
And each day it grows more and more,
I’m not ashamed to call and plead to you, baby,
If pleading keeps you from walking out that door.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Buddy Holly – Raining In My Heart

Happy Monday everyone…if any Monday can be happy.

Raining In My Heart is a beautiful title of a song. This is not a rocking Buddy tune…but a gorgeous ballad. John Fogerty once said that a title of a song is the most important part. If you find a great title for a song you are inspired to work with it.

It was originally recorded by Buddy Holly with the orchestral backing by Dick Jacobs. On the single, it was credited to Buddy Holly and the Crickets, but an Orchestra took the Crickets place. The music and lyrics were written by Felice Bryant and Boudleaux Bryant. It was recorded at the Pythian Temple on West 70th Street in New York City

Raining In My Heart was released as a single on Coral Records in 1959. It peaked at #88 on the Billboard charts as the B-side of “It Doesn’t Matter Anymore”. This song has been covered by artists such as P.J. Proby, Ray Price, Anne Murray, Hank Marvin, Tommy Roe, Skeeter David, and many more.

Buddy Holly was among the first group of inductees to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1986. In 2004, Rolling Stone ranked Holly #13 among “The 100 Greatest Artists of All Time”.

Gregory Porter sang a duet with Buddy in 2018…with the backing track of course. He teamed up with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. I really like this one a lot.

Raining In My Heart

The sun is out, the sky is blue
There’s not a cloud to spoil the view
But it’s raining, raining in my heart

The weather man says clear today
He doesn’t know you’ve gone away
And it’s raining, raining in my heart

Oh, misery, misery
What’s gonna become of me?

I tell my blues they mustn’t show
But soon these tears are bound to flow
‘Cause it’s raining, raining in my heart

But it’s raining, raining in my heart

And it’s raining, raining in my heart

Oh, misery, misery
What’s gonna become of me?

I tell my blues they mustn’t show
But soon these tears are bound to flow
‘Cause it’s raining, raining in my heart

…

John Lee Hooker – Boogie Chillen

This is one of the places where rock and roll began.

I knew this sounded familiar…ZZ Top reworked this into their 1973 hit “La Grange.” In 1992, Bernard Besman, who was Hooker’s producer and controlled the copyright to “Boogie Chillen,” sued ZZ Top, but a court eventually ruled that Hooker’s song was in the public domain.

I love any version of this song out there but the two I like the best are the original and when Hooker played with Canned Heat on the album…Hooker and Heat.

In 1948, Hooker showed up at the office of a Detroit record store/label owner named Bernard Besman and presented him with a demo. Besman provided the studio and produced this song for Hooker. They worked together for the next four years, recording many of Hooker’s songs, but Boogie Chillen was the big hit.

The song peaked at #1 in the R&B Charts and sold over a million copies after Besman leased the rights to distribute the song to Modern Records. When the song took off, Hooker still had his day job working as a janitor in a Chrysler factory.

Hooker is the only person performing on the song. The only sounds are his voice, guitar, and stomping feet. The tapping sounds came from bottle caps attached to the soles of his shoes.

“Chillen” is Southern slang for “Children.” This was the first song Buddy Guy learned how to play on guitar. Growing up in Lettsworth, Louisiana in a small house with no electricity or running water, Guy heard this song when a family friend, Henry “Coot” Smith, would come over and play it on his guitar.

Boogie Chillen

Well, my mama ‘low me just to stay out all night long
Oh, Lord
Well, my mama ‘low me just to stay out all night long
I didn’t care she ‘low, I would boogie anyhow

When I first came to town, people, I was walkin’ down Hastings Street
Everybody was talkin’ about the Henry Swing Club
I decided I drop in there that night
When I got there, I say, “Yes, people”
They was really havin’ a ball
Yes, I know

Boogie Chillen’

One night I was layin’ down
I heard mama and papa talkin’
I heard papa tell mama let that boy boogie-woogie
It’s in him and it got to come out
And I felt so good
Went on boogin’ just the same

Dick Cavett

Johnny Carson

Bill Burr

Chris Rock

Jim Gaffigan

Bob Saget

Steve Allen

Joey Bishop

***WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS***

***WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS***

Robin Williams

Robert Klein

Jerry Seinfeld

Dave Allen

Brother Dave Gardner

Peter Cook

Dudley Moore

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS