Badfinger (Max)

Comedian Quotes IV

Some more comedians this week and next week we will be wrapping this up. Thank you for the suggestions…some will appear next week including my favorite talk show host.

Robin Williams

You know the difference between a tornado and divorce in the South? Nothing! Someone’s losing a trailer, number one

Reality is just a crutch for people who can’t cope with drugs

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you you’re making too much money

Marriage is a triumph of imagination over intelligence

A woman would never make a nuclear bomb. They would never make a weapon that kills, no, no. They’d make a weapon that makes you feel bad for a while

The only reason Mickey Mouse has four fingers is that he can’t pick up a check

Being a famous print journalist is like being the best-dressed woman on the radio

Death is nature’s way of saying, ‘Your table is ready

People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the white house

Robert Klein

In the fifties I had dreams about touching a naked woman and she would turn to bronze or the dream about hot dogs chasing donuts through the Lincoln Tunnel.

And the only studies were – Rodney Dangerfield was my mentor and he was my Yale drama school for comedy.

Fear is the greatest salesman.

In the book of things people more often do wrong than right, investing must certainly top the list, followed closely by wallpapering and eating artichokes

Comedy is still alive, and there are still funny people. Jews are still overrepresented in comedy and psychiatry and underrepresented in the priesthood. That immigrant Jewish humor is still with us.

I learned more at The Second City than I did at Yale for all that high tuition.

Jerry Seinfeld

A two-year-old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.”

There [are] just two things I’d need to find out everything I want to know about everyone: 1) Let me see them drive; 2) let me hear them talk about marriage … That’s going to tell me exactly your relationship to the world.

The IRS! They’re like the Mafia, they can take anything they want!

Men don’t care what’s on TV. They only care what else is on TV

If a book about failures doesn’t sell, is it a success

Your blessing in life is when you find the torture you’re comfortable with

What’s the deal with Ovaltine? It comes in a round container, you put it in a round glass, why don’t they call it Roundtine?

Dave Allen

If it’s sent by ship then it’s a cargo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a shipment.

We spend our lives on the run: we get up by the clock, eat and sleep by the clock, get up again, go to work – and then we retire. And what do they give us? A bloody clock.

My church accepts all denominations – fivers, tenners, twenties.

Am I the Irish comedian with half a finger? No, I’m the Irish comedian with nine and a half fingers.

I don’t go out of my way to be outrageous, I just go out of my way to look at things.

Brother Dave Gardner

The South may not always be right, but by God it’s never wrong!

Rock music sounds like an octopus making love to a bagpipe

Let them that don’t want none have memories of not gettin’ any

Love your enemies and drive them nuts

Peter Cook

I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly

As I looked out into the night sky, across all those infinite stars, it made me realize how insignificant they are.

You realize that suicide’s a criminal offense. In less enlightened times they’d have hung you for it.

Everything I’ve ever told you, including this, is a lie

Dudley Moore

I’m always looking for meaningful one-night stands

Not everyone who drinks is a poet. Some of us drink because we’re not poets

When I think of Canada I think of tonic water.

Masturbation is always very safe. You not only control the person you’re with, but you can leave when you want to

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it

Twilight Zone – Uncle Simon

★★★1/2 November 15, 1963 Season 5 Episode 8

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

This is not a top drawer Twilight Zone episode. On the surface… the problem is no relatable character and absolutely no sympathy. Uncle Simon is a sick, mean, and vindictive old man. He was being cared for by Constance Ford who plays Barbara Polk. Uncle Simon is quite mean to Barbara but she stayed for 25 years putting up with it. You have to wonder why Barbara is still there taking his abuse for years. As you watch you start finding out why.

Its a sad story about two sad people, both of whom make it a point to say everything thats on their mind but by this point. Uncle Simon tells Barbara at one point “You are the only woman I know who looks as if, underneath her clothes, she wore clothes.” That perfectly described the bland Barbara. I wanted so much to feel pity for Barbara…and in some ways I do but her reasons for being there are to inherit the mansion and money. You just get the feeling she wasn’t there for the right reasons.

There is one bright spot. Robby the Robot makes an appearance in this one. Robby has 30 screen credits from 1956 Forbidden Planet to 2014’s The Big Bang Theory.

From IMDB:

The Twilight Zone: Probe 7, Over and Out (1963), the next episode of The Twilight Zone (1959), would not air for two weeks. The broadcast of the following week’s episode on November 22, 1963, which was to have been The Twilight Zone: Night Call (1964), was canceled due to the assassination of U.S. President John F. Kennedy in Dallas, Texas that day.

Robby the Robot from Forbidden Planet (1956) is used in this episode. However, the dome portion of his head has been altered. This is one of many instalments to use props from “Forbidden Planet”, since the series was frequently filmed at MGM, which kept the film props in use for many years.

This show was written by Rod Serling

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

Dramatis personae: Mr. Simon Polk, a gentleman who has lived out his life in a gleeful rage; and the young lady who’s just beat the hasty retreat is Mr. Polk’s niece, Barbara. She has lived her life as if during each ensuing hour she had a dentist appointment. There is yet a third member of the company soon to be seen. He now resides in the laboratory and he is the kind of character to be found only in the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Barbara Polk takes care of her elderly and mean-spirited uncle Simon. He is a scientist who spends much of his time in his basement laboratory but when he’s not there, he seems to take great pleasure in demeaning his niece. She can’t wait for him to die and doesn’t hesitate to tell him so. When he does die, things are… not quite what she expected.

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Dramatis personae, a metal man who’ll go by the name of Simon, whose life as well as his body has been stamped out for him; and the woman who tends to him, the lady Barbara, who’s discovered belatedly that all bad things don’t come to an end, and that once a bed is made, it’s quite necessary that you sleep in it. Tonight’s uncomfortable little exercise in avarice and automatons, from the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Cedric Hardwicke … Uncle Simon
Constance Ford … Barbara Polk
Ian Wolfe … Schwimmer
Robby the Robot … Robotic Uncle Simon

Rolling Stones – Ain’t Too Proud To Beg

If I had to pick my favorite Stones song they covered…this one would be high up there. I like the intro and Keith’s sloppy guitar solo that was perfect for it.

The Stones covered this song in 1974 on the It’s Only Rock ‘n’ Roll album. Later in 1978 they would cover another Temptations song called Just My Imagination.

The Stones originally planned for Dobie Gray’s “Drift Away” as the only cover song on It’s Only Rock ‘n’ Roll, but they bumped it for this. Billy Preston plays the funky piano on this song, and it really makes it.

It’s Only Rock and Roll would be the last album that Mick Taylor worked on. Ron Wood would eventually replace him on guitar. Wood probably fit in with the Stones more than Taylor…but Taylor had a sound that was never replicated again. The albums he played on are considered to be the Stones best.

This was written by Motown writers Norman Whitfield and Eddie Holland. Holland, who was part of the Holland/Dozier/Holland writing team, wrote the lyrics. The Temptations version peaked at #13.

Other covers of this song include Phil Collins, TLC, and the one and only Rick Astley… whom the Internet’s never going to give up..

The song peaked at #17 in the Billboard 100 and #14 in Canada in 1974.

Paul McCartney: “There were two songs I turned Mick onto that the Stones have done. One was She Said Yeah and the other was Ain’t Too Proud To Beg. Mick would deny it – ‘Wot? Never saw him, never met him’ – but I distinctly remember having him up into a little music room and playing it to him. He loved it and he went and did it. We’ve messed around with the track a little bit, but it is sort of like my memory of the original.”

Ain’t Too Proud To Beg

I know you wanna leave me,
But I refuse to let you go,
If I have to beg, plead for your sympathy,
I don’t mind ’cause you mean that much to me.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Now I’ve heard a cryin’ man
Is half a man with no sense of pride,
But if I have to cry to keep you,
I don’t mind weepin’ if it’ll keep you by my side.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

If I have to sleep on your doorstep all night and day
Just to keep you from walking away,
Let your friends laugh, even this I can stand,
’cause I wanna keep you any way I can.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Now I’ve got a love so deep in the pit of my heart,
And each day it grows more and more,
I’m not ashamed to call and plead to you, baby,
If pleading keeps you from walking out that door.

Ain’t too proud to beg and you know it,
Please don’t leave me girl,
Don’t you go,
Ain’t too proud to plead, baby, baby,
Please don’t leave me, girl,
Don’t you go.

Buddy Holly – Raining In My Heart

Happy Monday everyone…if any Monday can be happy.

Raining In My Heart is a beautiful title of a song. This is not a rocking Buddy tune…but a gorgeous ballad. John Fogerty once said that a title of a song is the most important part. If you find a great title for a song you are inspired to work with it.

It was originally recorded by Buddy Holly with the orchestral backing by Dick Jacobs. On the single, it was credited to Buddy Holly and the Crickets, but an Orchestra took the Crickets place. The music and lyrics were written by Felice Bryant and Boudleaux Bryant. It was recorded at the Pythian Temple on West 70th Street in New York City

Raining In My Heart was released as a single on Coral Records in 1959. It peaked at #88 on the Billboard charts as the B-side of “It Doesn’t Matter Anymore”. This song has been covered by artists such as P.J. Proby, Ray Price, Anne Murray, Hank Marvin, Tommy Roe, Skeeter David, and many more.

Buddy Holly was among the first group of inductees to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 1986. In 2004, Rolling Stone ranked Holly #13 among “The 100 Greatest Artists of All Time”.

Gregory Porter sang a duet with Buddy in 2018…with the backing track of course. He teamed up with the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra. I really like this one a lot.

Raining In My Heart

The sun is out, the sky is blue
There’s not a cloud to spoil the view
But it’s raining, raining in my heart

The weather man says clear today
He doesn’t know you’ve gone away
And it’s raining, raining in my heart

Oh, misery, misery
What’s gonna become of me?

I tell my blues they mustn’t show
But soon these tears are bound to flow
‘Cause it’s raining, raining in my heart

But it’s raining, raining in my heart

And it’s raining, raining in my heart

Oh, misery, misery
What’s gonna become of me?

I tell my blues they mustn’t show
But soon these tears are bound to flow
‘Cause it’s raining, raining in my heart

…

John Lee Hooker – Boogie Chillen

This is one of the places where rock and roll began.

I knew this sounded familiar…ZZ Top reworked this into their 1973 hit “La Grange.” In 1992, Bernard Besman, who was Hooker’s producer and controlled the copyright to “Boogie Chillen,” sued ZZ Top, but a court eventually ruled that Hooker’s song was in the public domain.

I love any version of this song out there but the two I like the best are the original and when Hooker played with Canned Heat on the album…Hooker and Heat.

In 1948, Hooker showed up at the office of a Detroit record store/label owner named Bernard Besman and presented him with a demo. Besman provided the studio and produced this song for Hooker. They worked together for the next four years, recording many of Hooker’s songs, but Boogie Chillen was the big hit.

The song peaked at #1 in the R&B Charts and sold over a million copies after Besman leased the rights to distribute the song to Modern Records. When the song took off, Hooker still had his day job working as a janitor in a Chrysler factory.

Hooker is the only person performing on the song. The only sounds are his voice, guitar, and stomping feet. The tapping sounds came from bottle caps attached to the soles of his shoes.

“Chillen” is Southern slang for “Children.” This was the first song Buddy Guy learned how to play on guitar. Growing up in Lettsworth, Louisiana in a small house with no electricity or running water, Guy heard this song when a family friend, Henry “Coot” Smith, would come over and play it on his guitar.

Boogie Chillen

Well, my mama ‘low me just to stay out all night long
Oh, Lord
Well, my mama ‘low me just to stay out all night long
I didn’t care she ‘low, I would boogie anyhow

When I first came to town, people, I was walkin’ down Hastings Street
Everybody was talkin’ about the Henry Swing Club
I decided I drop in there that night
When I got there, I say, “Yes, people”
They was really havin’ a ball
Yes, I know

Boogie Chillen’

One night I was layin’ down
I heard mama and papa talkin’
I heard papa tell mama let that boy boogie-woogie
It’s in him and it got to come out
And I felt so good
Went on boogin’ just the same

Twilight Zone – The Old Man in the Cave

★★★★1/2 November 8, 1963 Season 5 Episode 7

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

As far as the rating on this one. I was in between 4.5 and 5…it could go either way. It is a great episode.

James Coburn (French) and John Anderson (Goldsmith) are terrific in this Twilight Zone episode. The Old Man in the Cave dwells on a small group of Atomic Holocaust survivors whose status quo is maintained by an unseen source that lives in a cave. Mr Goldsmith is the leader of this group and he is told what to do by this cave dweller.

Coburn’s character is the neighborhood bully with power. He swaggers in with his men and take over the group. He mock’s Mr. Goldsmith about the faith he has with the cave dweller’s instructions. Against Goldsmiths vehement objections, they distribute food and liquor branded contaminated by the Old Man in the cave. Resentful over their past restrictions, the townspeople force Goldsmith to open the cave. The “Old Man” is seen…but as what?

The ugly side of human beings is on full display in this episode. Humans without faith in something can be scared, frightened, and in turn… scary.

From IMDB: Based upon the short story “The Old Man” by Henry Slesar. Though it was copyrighted in 1962, the story went unpublished until 1980, when it appeared in the anthology Microcosmic Tales from Taplinger Pub. Co.

This show was written by Rod Serling and Henry Slesar

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

What you’re looking at is a legacy that man left to himself. A decade previous he pushed his buttons and a nightmarish moment later woke up to find that he had set the clock back a thousand years. His engines, his medicines, his science were buried in a mass tomb, covered over by the biggest gravedigger of them all—a bomb. And this is the earth 10 years later, a fragment of what was once a whole, a remnant of what was once a race. The year is 1974 and this is The Twilight Zone.

Summary

Ten years after an atomic apocalypse, a small group of survivors manage to eke out a very difficult existence. They’ve managed to survive in large part due to the advice they receive from an old man who lives in a cave outside of the town. Goldsmith acts as the intermediary and the old man’s advice on things like crops or the safety of a batch of old canned goods are usually correct. When four soldiers led by Major French arrive in the town, the social order is upended with the townsfolk attacking the old man’s cave but not really prepared for what they find inside

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Mr. Goldsmith, survivor. An eyewitness to man’s imperfection. An observer of the very human trait of greed. And a chronicler of the last chapter—the one reading “suicide”. Not a prediction of what is to be, just a projection of what could be. This has been The Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
James Coburn … French
John Anderson … Goldsmith
Josie Lloyd … Evie, townswoman who says, “We already took chances. The old man told us not to plant on the north acreage.”
John Craven … townsman who asks, “Been to the cave, Jason?”
John Marley … Jason
Uncredited (in order of appearance):
Natalie Masters … townswoman
Don Wilbanks … Furman

Beatles Rooftop Concert at IMAX

My son Bailey bought us tickets to see The Beatles rooftop concert in the IMAX theater on Friday night. If you get a chance to do this…do it. It sounds like you are there listening live. It lasts around 1:30 minutes. They added a brief Beatles history and a little followup after the performance.

They played on the freezing rooftop of Apple Records on January 6, 1969. It was the first time they played in front of an audience since August 29, 1966. You could see the breath of people on the roof and in the street. It is not easy playing in cold weather. Your fingers freeze and you cannot feel the strings. It’s a wonder their guitars didn’t go out of tune more.

It was clear that the Beatles could have toured like their peers The Stones, Led Zeppelin, and The Who and sounded every bit as good. They were very raw and earthy sounding because of the type of songs they were writing at the time. Songs that could be played live, not the Sgt Peppers experimental music. The songs linked to the style of the White Album.

They had just written these songs and rehearsed them that month so the songs were new to them except One After 909. John and Paul wrote that one when they were teenagers. It’s hard to believe how young they were at the time. None of them were thirty but they had packed a lot of living in their years being The Beatles.

John Lennon was normally a rhythm guitar player but he plays the lead on Get Back and you can tell he enjoyed stepping up and doing that. They would complete one more album after this…and that was Abbey Road. That is called going out on top.

To see them in an IMAX theater was amazing. It looked like it was recorded yesterday…not 53 years ago. I’ve seen the Get Back documentary twice but it’s nothing like seeing the concert at a theater…it changes the dynamics of it…plus IMAX just makes it that much better.

It would have been interesting to see them play in a more controlled enviroment but I’m glad we got this. Right after John Lennon said ” I’d like to say thank you on behalf of the group and ourselves, and I hope we pass the audition.”…someone in the theater shouted out…”You most certainly did John”

That about sums it up.

….

Beatles – Help! ….Album

I don’t post many albums, but I wanted to go over this one. This will be the UK version of the album. The American version was a different album with the soundtrack music replacing some of the songs.

In my opinion, it was one of the most important albums the Beatles ever released. The album signaled a change with the Beatles. Rubber Soul is usually credited as the album that represented the Beatles transformation from pure a rock/pop band into something more. I’ve always seen Help! as the bridge from Beatlemania to the middle period of Rubber Soul and Revolver. With songs like You’ve Got to Hide Your Love Away, The Night Before, I’ve Just Seen A Face, and Ticket to Ride it was apparent that a change was coming.

Was the album as good as Rubber Soul? No, but it cleared the way for the change that was coming. In 1963 the Beatles released She Loves You…4 years later they recorded A Day In The Life. That is only 4 years…it would be like building a go-cart and 4 years later building a rocket and going to the moon. There were steps in between though and Help! was one of them. What makes the Beatles so special is they didn’t repeat themselves. They progressed with every album into a different sound and feel. It wasn’t only drugs but social issues, fame, isolation, and superior songwriting skills.

You can tell pot had some influence on this album. Most of the songs were not as fast-paced with a beat group mentality. You still had some songs that were the Beatles that everyone knew at the time. Songs like You’re Going to Lose That Girl, and the two covers Act Naturally and Dizzy Miss Lizzy. I’ve always liked You’re Going to Lose That Girl with the call and response and Ringo did an excellent job on Act Naturally.

I think the most underrated song on the album is The Night Before. If any other band did this song…it would have been a single. Other songs that I like (that were not hits) are It’s Only Love (although Lennon hated it), I’ve Just Seen A Face, I Need You, and Another Girl.

I shouldn’t rate Beatle albums because it’s hard for me to be objective about them but I would give this 5 out of 5 stars. A fun movie also if you get a chance …watch it.

Track Listing

Help!
The Night Before
You’ve Got To Hide Your Love Away
I Need You
Another Girl
You’re Going To Lose That Girl
Ticket To Ride

Act Naturally
It’s Only Love
You Like Me Too Much
Tell Me What You See
I’ve Just Seen A Face
Yesterday
Dizzy Miss Lizzy

Twilight Zone – Living Doll

★★★★★ November 1, 1963 Season 5 Episode 6

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

This episode launched a lot of horror movies like Child’s Play. It did have a future star…the great Telly Savalas as a stepfather named Erich Streator. Mr. Streator is not a likable character but yet you may have a little pity for him as the show goes along. He shows glimpses of being a decent human being but fails miserably with his role as a stepfather. You do have to look deep to find sympathy.

He has a great wife (Mary La Roche) and a stepdaughter (Christie) who loves her new doll. The doll can talk and move… “My name is Talking Tina and I love you very much.”

You have so much sympathy for his wife Annabelle…even without the doll. Some people might say that the episode is predictable but remember…there weren’t many shows out about talking dolls at the time…maybe none. There is no comedy in this one like the Chucky movies that came decades later. The doll is working as Christie’s protector…at least you think so. Is it all in Erich Streator’s head?

From IMDB:

June Foray, the voice of the “Talky Tina” doll, was also the voice of Mattel’s “Chatty Cathy” doll, upon which the doll in this episode was based.

Tina and Christie are both nicknames for Christina. The doll and the child share a name, so among many other interpretations it could be argued that the doll is a proxy through which Christie expresses hostility toward her stepfather and protects her shy, frightened mother.

According to The Twilight Zone Companion, this episode was written in one day by Jerry Sohl, even though credit was given entirely to Charles Beaumont.

The child actress who portrays Christie is credited as being the voice of “Lucy Van Pelt” in the classic TV special, “A Charlie Brown Christmas”.

This show was written by Rod Serling, Charles Beaumont, and Jerry Sohl

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

Talky Tina, a doll that does everything, a lifelike creation of plastic and springs and painted smile. To Erich Streator, she is the most unwelcome addition to his household—but without her, he’d never enter the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Erich Streater is upset when his wife comes home with her daughter Christie having bought her yet another doll. Christie loves her new Talking Tina doll but her stepfather takes an immediate dislike to it. Anytime he is alone with the doll, it spouts abusive comments to the effect that it hates him and that it’s going to kill him. He’s convinced that his wife is behind it all, something she vehemently denies. He tries to get rid of the doll but it always seems to reappear – and also seems intent on following through with its threats.

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

Of course, we all know dolls can’t really talk, and they certainly can’t commit murder. But to a child caught in the middle of turmoil and conflict, a doll can become many things: friend, defender, guardian. Especially a doll like Talky Tina, who did talk and did commit murder—in the misty region of the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling … Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Telly Savalas … Erich Streator
Mary La Roche … Annabelle Streator
Tracy Stratford … Christie Streator
June Foray … Talky Tina (voice) [uncredited]

Hank Williams – Move It On Over

Whenever I’m asked if I like country music…at first, I wonder what country they mean. If they mean commercial top 40…then not. If they mean Hank Williams, then a big fat yes. In this country, I hear a little rockabilly and country mix…which is a great thing.

Hank Williams as a songwriter is up there with the greats. Bob Dylan and more idolized him and his writing. This song was his first big hit. The song was written by the man himself. He released this song in 1947. Two years later, he received his invitation to join the Grand Ole Opry after his successful recording of the minstrel era song, “Lovesick Blues.”

Move It On Over peaked at #4 in the Country Charts in 1947.

Despite never learning to read music, Williams was a prolific songwriter including country music classics such as “Hey, Good Lookin’,” “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry,” and “Your Cheatin’ Heart.” He recorded a total of 66 songs in his six-year recording career, 37 of which became hit records. It was not unheard of for Williams to record three hit songs in one afternoon. Now think about this… out of 66 songs recorded…37 were hits… That is like batting over .500.

Williams was plagued by back pain throughout his life, likely due to spina bifida. Life on the road as a Country singer only made it worse. An operation in 1951 gave him no relief and actually increased his pain. The combination of unending physical pain and the pressure of being a successful recording artist led to Williams seeking solace in drugs in alcohol.

Many of you will remember this song by George Thorogood released in 1978 and picked up a lot of airplay.

Move It On Over

I come in last night about half past ten
That baby of mine wouldn’t let me in
So move it on over, rock it on over
Move over little dog, the mean old dog is movin’ in

She told me not to mess around
But I done let the deal go down
Move it on over, rock it on over
Move over nice dog, a big fat dog is movin’ in

She changed the lock on my back door
Now my key won’t fit no more
Move it on over, rock it on over
Move over nice dog, the mean old dog is movin’ in

She threw me out just as pretty as she pleased
Pretty soon I’ll be scratchin’ fleas
Move it on over, slide it on over
Move over nice dog, a mean old dog is movin’ in

Yeah, listen to me dog before you start to whine
That side yours and this side mine
So move it on over, rock it on over
Move over little dog, the big old dog is movin’ in

Yeah, she changed the lock on my back door
Now my key won’t fit no more
Move it on over, rock it on over
Move over little dog, the big old dog is movin’ in

Move it on over, move it on over
Move it on over, won’t’cha rock it on over
Move over cool dog, the hot dog’s movin’ in

Beatles – Ticket To Ride

According to John Lennon, when the Beatles were in Hamburg, prostitutes had to have a piece of paper proving they have a clean bill of health…as in a Ticket To Ride. McCartney said it was “a British Railways ticket to the town of Ryde on the Isle of Wight.” Lennon’s description caught a 9-year-old boy’s imagination much more.

George Harrison came up with the way the riff was played. Ringo came up with a distinctive staccato drum pattern for this song based on the way George played it. He said a big part of his drumming style is being a left-handed drummer trying to play right-handed.

I remember this the most by it being used in the Beatles movie Help! in the scene where The Beatles ski… poorly. Copies of the original single released on Capitol Records say: “From the United Artists Release ‘Eight Arms To Hold You’,” which was the original working title of Help!

The Beatles were one of the first groups to make music videos, which were done so they could promote their songs without showing up at TV stations. They made one for “Ticket To Ride” in a shoot where they did four other songs as well. All the footage was shot in the studio; this one saw the band performing in front of oversized tickets for trains and busses.

The song peaked at #1 in the Billboard 100, Canada and the UK in 1965.

Carl Palmer: “One of the most exciting, rhythmical patterns and parts and songs that I ever heard, which I thought was really big-time and had it all going is a track by The Beatles called ‘Ticket To Ride, the drum part on that I always thought was exceptional.”

From Songfacts

The Beatles taped a performance of this song that was broadcast on an episode of Ed Sullivan Show that aired September 12, 1965 (the last Ed Sullivan show broadcast in black and white). The Beatles recorded it prior to their Shea Stadium concert that took place August 15.

The Carpenters covered this in 1969 with the gender reversed to suit lead vocalist Karen Carpenter (“he’s got a ticket to ride…” Their mellow version was released as the duo’s first single and included on their first album, which was also called Ticket To Ride. Their rendition didn’t chart, but made its way onto plenty of light rock playlists.

In Stephen King’s 1977 novel The Shining, a supernatural Big Band ensemble plays a swing version of this at The Overlook Hotel.

Ticket To Ride

I think I’m gonna be sad
I think it’s today, yeah
The girl that’s driving me mad
Is going away

She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
But she don’t care

She said that living with me
Is bringing her down yeah
For she would never be free
When I was around

She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
But she don’t care

I don’t know why she’s ridin’ so high
She ought to think twice
She ought to do right by me
Before she gets to saying goodbye
She ought to think twice,
She ought to do right by me
I think I’m gonna be sad
I think it’s today yeah
The girl that’s driving me mad
Is going away, yeah

She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
But she don’t care

I don’t know why she’s ridin’ so high
She ought to think twice
She ought to do right by me
Before she gets to saying goodbye
She ought to think twice
She ought to do right by me
She said that living with me
Is bringing her down, yeah
For she would never be free
When I was around

Ah, she’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
She’s got a ticket to ride
But she don’t care

My baby don’t care, my baby don’t care
My baby don’t care, my baby don’t care
My baby don’t care, my baby don’t care

Comedian Quotes III

This week we are going to feature some Comedians from the 70s and 80s. My personal favorite is Bill HIcks…the darkest comedian I have listened to but funny. Steven Wright takes the quotes to a different level.

Steven Wright

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, ‘Where the hell is my roof?

Last night I played a blank tape at full blast. The mime next door went nuts.

Whose cruel idea was it for the word “lisp” to have an “s” in it?

I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.

Is it true that cannibals don’t eat clowns because they taste funny?

Bill Hicks

I loved when Bush came out and said, ‘We are losing the war against drugs.’ You know what that implies? There’s a war being fought, and the people on drugs are winning it.

We all pay for life with death, so everything in between should be free.

I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.

When two or more people agree on an issue, I form on the other side.

On the theft of his material by Denis Leary: “I have a scoop for you. I stole his act. I camouflaged it with punchlines, and to really throw people off, I did it before he did.

It’s all about money, not freedom, y’all, okay? Nothing to do with fuckin’ freedom. If you think you’re free, try going somewhere without fucking money, okay?

The whole image is that eternal suffering awaits anyone who questions God’s infinite love. That’s the message we’re brought up with, isn’t it? Believe or die! Thank you, forgiving Lord, for all those options.

Sam Kinison

If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows.

Folks, I’ve been straight for seventeen days… Not all in a row.

My view of life is, ‘If you’re going to miss Heaven, why miss it by two inches? Miss it!

Rock Against Drugs, what a name. Somebody was high when they came up with that title. It’s like Christians Against Christ. Rock created drugs.

I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

I look for women I know are gonna bust me up good. Come on, man, who can resist that? Who can resist that emotional pain? Yeah, they all have the same line, they’re so sweet: I’m not gonna hurt you like all the others. Really I’m not. I’m gonna introduce you to a whole new level of pain!

Jesus is still up in Heaven, thumbing through his Bible, going ‘Where did I say build a water slide?

I called a detox center – just to see how much it would cost: $13,000 for three weeks! My friends, if you can come up with thirteen grand, you don’t have a problem yet.

Eddie Murphy

I spent my 30s fixing everything I broke in my 20s.

The best way you hurt rich people is by turning them into poor people.

The advice I would give to someone is to not take anyone’s advice.

Getting divorced didn’t sour me on the institution of marriage. I’ll tell you what I’ll never do: I’ll never get divorced again.

As you get older, you get different, and I’m a mushier, softer person as I get older.

Steve Martin

You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither

I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.

Boy, those French! They have a different word for everything

I gave my cat a bath the other day…they love it. He sat there, he enjoyed it, it was fun for me. The fur would stick to my tongue, but other than that…

Thinking too much also creates the illusion of causal connections between unrelated events.

George Burns

There’s an old saying, ‘Life begins at forty.’ That’s silly. Life begins every morning you wake up.

I get up every morning and read the obituary column. If my name’s not there, I eat breakfast.

You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.

It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.

I’d rather be over the hill than under it.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Twilight Zone – The Last Night of a Jockey

★★★1/2 October 25, 1963 Season 5 Episode 5

If you want to see where we are…HERE is a list of the episodes.

Rod Serling was great at this kind of low-life character. They were not evil but just the bottom of society. Mickey Rooney plays Grady who was small in more ways than one. He was a jockey who was disqualified from racing and he blames everyone but the one responsible…himself. Mickey Rooney runs a gamut of emotions from rage to grief to terrible self-loathing and is credible throughout. He carries the show…although he must because he is the only actor in it. A bit of Twilight Zone justice is dished out at the end.

This is another character that you won’t have much sympathy with at all. It is an impressive one-man show. Agnes Moorehead did this in The Invaders and was incredible.

This one is by no means a bad episode. It’s just not a classic one. I think the basic story was done better in Nervous Man in a Four Dollar Room, another episode of a self-pitying loser being lectured by his alter ego.

From IMDB: With exactly one performer appearing–either in image or voice, not counting Rod Serling’s routine turn as host–this episode features the smallest cast of any in the series. Close runner-ups include The Twilight Zone: Where Is Everybody? (1959), The Twilight Zone: King Nine Will Not Return (1960), The Twilight Zone: Nervous Man in a Four Dollar Room (1960), The Twilight Zone: The Invaders (1961) and The Twilight Zone: Two (1961).

This show was written by Rod Serling

Rod Serling’s Opening Narration:

The name is Grady, five feet short in stockings and boots, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses. He happens to be one of the rotten apples, bruised and yellowed by dealing in dirt, a short man with a short memory who’s forgotten that he’s worked for the sport of kings and helped turn it into a cesspool, used and misused by the two-legged animals who’ve hung around sporting events since the days of the Coliseum. So this is Grady, on his last night as a jockey. Behind him are Hialeah, Hollywood Park and Saratoga. Rounding the far turn and coming up fast on the rail—is the Twilight Zone.

Summary

Grady is a champion jockey who has recently been banned from the sport owing to his participation in race fixing and the drugging of horses. He claims he is innocent and currently has an appeal with the racing commission but his agent isn’t hopeful. Suddenly, Grady begins hearing a voice – his own as it turns out, speaking to him from his own mind. As Grady rages over the unfairness of it all, he is granted his one true wish.

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

Rod Serling’s Closing Narration:

The name is Grady, ten feet tall, a slightly distorted offshoot of a good breed of humans who race horses. Unfortunately for Mr. Grady, he learned too late that you don’t measure size with a ruler, you don’t figure height with a yardstick, and you never judge a man by how tall he looks in a mirror. The giant is as he does. You can make a parimutuel bet on this, win, place, or show, in or out of the Twilight Zone.

CAST

Rod Serling…Narrator / Self – Host (uncredited)
Mickey Rooney … Grady

Barney Miller… TV Show Draft

This is my first selection in the first round of the SlicetheLife TV Draft. And the envelope says……..Barney Miller.

I’ve watched Barney Miller at least 7 times through. Why is it my favorite show? It would be the writing, the acting, and that glorious dirty set that only got dirtier as the show went along. Another reason would be the continuity of the show. My pet peeve with shows is when you would meet someone’s “Uncle Joe” as his only uncle…and a season or two later…the same person never had an uncle. That is lazy writing and research…Barney Miller doesn’t have that. The show ran from 1975 to 1982 for 171 episodes.

You will see the same actor play different criminals (great 70s-character actors and actresses) but the storyline is set. Barney Miller was a comedy but also would dip in drama at times. Whatever was going on…the characters stayed true. It doesn’t hurt that the show had one of the best…if not the best theme songs. Dig that bass!

Many real life detectives were asked about the most realistic police show on television. Barney Miller was picked because they showed the drudgery parts like the paperwork involved that is a part of every policeman’s day. I’ve read where some officers today still say it is accurate in that way.

The guests on the show every week were usually the criminals they captured. They never had serial killers or anything like that (save for one episode when they were switched to homicide for that one show) …usually just people who caused a disturbance. You had every known petty criminal in the world on that show. Pickpocket, prostitute, madams, thieves, white-collar crime, and etc.

The jail cell in Barney Miller encapsulated the seventies and its times. The show could be topical about New York in the seventies. One episode has the squad listening to an actual speech given by President Ford only a few weeks before the show aired, in which he refused to bail out a near-bankrupt New York City while still committing aid to essential services like the police.

The show was ahead of its time. Barney Miller had diversity in the cast and guests. The diversity wasn’t there just to have diversity…it fit the story…it was never forced.

Danny Arnold created this show. He also wrote and produced some of Bewitched, That Girl, McHales Navy, and more.

Hal Liden has mentioned that they would film until 2-3 in the morning with script changes at the last minute. That was normal, not the exception. They had a studio audience at first but soon dropped that partly because of the script changes. The show never went down in quality. It was never a big ratings show because frankly, it was written well with subtle humor that it wasn’t as accessible as other shows.

If you haven’t given Barney Miller a chance…it’s worth one.

I’m going to list the characters in this show because it is such a character-driven show.

The characters are:

Barney Miller (Hal Linden) The man that leads with common sense and wisdom over his squad of quirky detectives and officers. Hal Linden has said that his character could not get as crazy as the other ones because the audience had to identify with him and have someone to compare the others to.

Det. Stan Wojciehowicz..”Wojo”(Max Gail) – An ex-Marine who fought in Vietnam who is sometimes naive and childlike but really looks to Barney as a mentor. Wojo is not always tolerant of people with different views than him but is a good detective but highly emotional.

Det. Ron Harris (Ron Glass) – A well-dressed man who lives beyond his means at times. He wants the finer things in life and can be a little snobbish at times but he is a good guy. As the show continued, he was trying to establish a writing career and he wrote the best-selling book called “Blood on the Badge” that sometimes disrupted the station but he would stay loyal to Barney even through their differences.

Sgt. Nick Yemana (Jack Soo) – A Japanese Detective that always had an answer, loved gambling and he would call his bookie often… and he made the coffee for the office…and supposedly the worse coffee ever…To me, he was one of the funniest characters on the show. Actor Jack Soo passed away while the show was in its 5th season in January of 1979. During that season the cast did a tribute show speaking as themselves and showed clips of Jack.

Sgt. Arthur Dietrich (Steve Landesberg) – A one-of-a-kind character and my favorite on the show. Dietrich was a know it all…not in the usual way. He really knew about every statistic on any subject that came up. He was an intellectual but also could have fun with it. One of the funniest and deadpan characters I’ve ever seen on television. He never lost his cool in any situation.

Sgt Philip Fish (Abe Vigoda) – The senior member of the crew who was played by Abe Vigoda always looked older than he was at the time. It was a running joke about him having hemorrhoids, needing to go to the bathroom, being old, and delivering many marriage jokes. He would leave the show for a spinoff “Fish” officially in the 4th season. He would come back and make guest star appearances. He was the break-out star of the show.

Sgt. Chano Amenguale (Gregory Sierra) – He was Puerto Rican and would be very talkative and emotional. Whenever he was really upset, he would start speaking Spanish loudly. I really liked Sierra’s character, but he left after the second season.

Officer Carl Levitt (Ron Carey) – Levitt was a short overachiever and kept hounding Barney for a promotion. He would not be too subtle to Barney about his hard-working habits. The rest of the station would pick on him but all of them respected his hard work. He would fill in when a Detective was out. He finally got promoted at the end of the show’s run.

Deputy Inspector Frank Luger (James Gregory) – A totally old school superior who would drop by “the old one two” to talk with Barney. Luger never even tried to keep up with the times. He would tell Barney of the good old days…sometimes to Barney’s annoyance. Overall Luger was a great character who was brilliantly played by James Gregory.

Elizabeth Miller (Barbara Barrie) She was Barney’s wife who always wanted him to quit the force because she worried about his safety. She was on regularly at first but the show started to concentrate on the station rather than their home. She was involved in a story later on in the series when Elizabeth and Barney separated for a while…they eventually got back together.

Det. Janice Wentworth (Linda Lavin) She was a detective in the squad room who had a romantic interest in Wojo. Prone to excitement trying to prove herself in a room full of men. The writing for her character was great…it was realistic and always suited Lavin’s character. The character would have stayed on the show but Linda Lavin got her own show…Alice.

Ben Scanlon(George Murdock) – Scanlon worked in Internal Affairs and was the one bad guy in the show. He would try to find trouble when he visited…always wanted to find some wrongdoing to bring down the 12th Precinct because they had a perfect record.

I’ve searched on youtube for some different scenes…most of what they have is the “best of” each character. The good news is… youtube has many full episodes. I’m including the full episode of one the best….It’s called Hash. I’m also including the super theme song…again you gotta love that bass!

The theme song to Barney Miller

….

Elvis Presley – I Forgot To Remember To Forget

It’s been too long since I posted about the big E. How could someone, not like a song with a title like that?

Elvis didn’t want to record this song because he thought it was too Country, so drummer Johnny Bernero from Memphis was added to the mix. Up until this time, there was only Scotty Moore on guitar, Bill Bass on bass, and Elvis on rhythm guitar. This added an up-tempo beat…Elvis liked it and recorded the song, which became a Country hit. I know Elvis is Elvis, but his backing band was just as special to me. Scotty Moore was one of a kind.

This song was released twice. The Sun Records release first charted the following week (September 17, 1955) at #14 on Billboard’s Country Charts. On November 21, 1955, it was released yet again. On that day RCA Victor purchased Elvis’s contract from Sam Phillips. As part of the deal, RCA obtained the rights to all of Presley’s Sun recordings. Soon after, RCA pressed and distributed a single of “I Forgot to Remember to Forget” and “Mystery Train” on its own label.

This was Elvis’ first #1 on any chart. It peaked at #1 in the Country Charts and #2 in Canada in 1955.

The Beatles never recorded this song in the studio, but they did it for the BBC with George singing lead.

The song was written by Charlie Feathers and Stan Kesler. Kesler had already written Presley’s “I’m Left, You’re Right, She’s Gone” when he had the idea for this song.

Stan Kesler: “At that time, I was on the kick of catchy titles,” Kesler recalled. “When I began to think about that phrase, it just expanded into ‘I forgot to remember to forget her.’ From there, I started working on it, and it all fell together.”

The Beatles version… live in the BBC studios.

I Forgot To Remember To Forget

I forgot to remember to forget her
I can’t seem to get her off my mind
I thought I’d never miss her
But I found out somehow
I think about her almost all the time
The day she went away
I made myself a promise
That I’d soon forget we ever met
But something sure is wrong
‘Cause I’m so blue and lonely
I forgot to remember to forget

The day she went away
I made myself a promise
That I’d soon forget we ever met
Well, but something sure is wrong
‘Cause I’m so blue and lonely
I forgot to remember to forget

Robin Williams

Robert Klein

Jerry Seinfeld

Dave Allen

Brother Dave Gardner

Peter Cook

Dudley Moore

***WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS***

Steven Wright

Bill Hicks

Sam Kinison

Eddie Murphy

Steve Martin

George Burns

***WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS***

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS

WARNING…VIDEO SPOILERS