What Christmas Means To Me

This year I won’t be swamping you with many Christmas posts like I usually do, probably a relief to some…But I do really love Christmas. Because of work, I can’t post much through the week, but I’m going to try to get some in next weekend. This was written for Dave’s Turntable Talk, and the subject was What Christmas Means to Me. It was posted last week on his site. For those who didn’t see it…here it is. 

I remember Christmas when I was a young kid of around 4-5. We always had our Christmas on Christmas Eve. My family and I would have such a good time. We would start on Christmas Eve and go to my grandparents (my mom’s side) at around 5pm and eat, eat, and did I mention eat? Some of the kids there would get small gifts. Funny thing, though, my father would never go with us. It always puzzled me why he didn’t go and decided to stay at home. 

When we got home…Santa Claus would have miraculously already dropped by on Christmas Eve night! When I opened that door…it was a beautiful sight! A tree I had helped decorate with presents underneath. Also, with presents unwrapped and sitting around. The cookies I left out were always half-eaten.  I remember in my stockings I would get tangerines and oranges, as well as small gifts and candy. The tangerines were always cold. I just knew they were cold because they came from the North Pole. In different years, I remember the pinball machine, the Star Trek Enterprise bridge area toy, the Evel Knievel stunt motorcycle, albums, a record player, etc. My mom and dad were not rich by any means, and I wonder now how long they saved to give all of this stuff to Tammy (my sister) and me. Dad would be standing there and telling me he met Santa and helped him unload the sleigh. Ah! That was the reason he stayed at home, to help Santa. 

Soon after 1975, my mom and dad got divorced. Things changed in my life, and it sucked. I missed my dad being around, but my mom did her very best to be mother and father to my sister and me on an everyday basis. I would see Dad around 3 weeks or so a year. My mom didn’t like it when I went to his house a lot. Not because he was mean, abusive, or anything like that, but because of kidney stones and what he took to relieve the pain, and to excess. He had 70 stones in his life, and when he passed away in 2005, he still had two in him. It was the 1970s, and doctors gave him medicine to get up and to go to sleep, and he would self-medicate at times. He eventually got better and stopped that for the most part, but that was later on in the 1980s. He was never arrested or anything like that, or caused any trouble. He made guitars and musical instruments, and one time drove from Nashville to Los Angeles in 2 days without sleep.

The ONE time a year my entire family was together (every year) was Christmas. Mom and Dad never fought on Christmas (even right after the divorce), and they grew closer each year. Both got married again, but that never affected how they acted. So, to answer the question, Christmas is about family to me, and now, as the years pass, my mom and dad are always near me. That was the only time I saw them all together every year after the divorce. I’m fiercely protective about Christmas to this day. Until dad passed away, every Christmas, he would come down. He only missed one year, and it was because of an ice storm in the early 2000s. When Bailey was born in 2000, we all always had a great time, and it brought back memories of being a kid again. The only Christmas activity I changed was that Bailey had his Christmas on Christmas Day after waking up from Christmas Eve.

 I’ve been with Jennifer since 1993, and Bailey came along in 2000. We were together every single Christmas until around 2021 when Bailey went to Germany and be with his girlfriend. I argued with him about it. It’s probably the only argument we ever got into in his adult life. Yeah, I was wrong, but it was the history of it for me. I knew I had to let go…I told him…you could be gone for 364 other days, and I would be fine…but of course I got over it. He has alternated ever since. My sister, her son, his wife, and their children always come down as well.

Funny, my mom and dad almost got back together in the 90s, but my mom started to lose her memory at an early age (high blood pressure and mini strokes in her 40s), and it never happened. Mom and Dad ended up dying within 6 months of each other in 2005 – 2006. To this day, I think of mom and dad while Tammy comes down on Christmas Eve. I know it’s kinda unorthodox on how Christmas is to me, but it’s the truth. And…I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world…so Merry Christmas to you all…and to mom and dad.

…

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Author: Badfinger (Max)

Power Pop fan, Baseball, Beatles, Alternative music, old movies, and tv show fan. Also anything to do with pop culture in the 60s and 70s... I'm also a songwriter, bass and guitar player. Not the slightest bit interested in politics at all.

40 thoughts on “What Christmas Means To Me”

  1. Never heard this version of “Silent Night” before. Beautiful. What wonderful memories you’ve shared with us. Family is definitely the key. Fortunately, all of my siblings are still alive (I lost one of my brothers-in-law in 2017), but everyone else is gone. I have great memories of my aunts and uncles at Christmas time. I always got an orange in my stocking too, with candy. I would always eat it after I opened my presents. That’s why the smell of oranges being cut or peeled brings me right back to Christmas morning. Have a great holiday season.

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    1. You brought up a good point…orange peels do the same thing to me…that smell. Thanks for reading. I’m glad you stil lhave all of your siblings…that means a lot. Sorry about your brother in law…
      I hope you have a great one!

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      2. They are doing fine! Rudy though has ballooned up so Mr. Rudy is on a diet. It’s our fault. I bought a bag of peanuts and we didn’t think anything about it…we fed him a lot of peanuts so now…strickly prairie dog pellets for him…they are prone to gain weight. He is slowly taking it off!
        But thank you for asking…all is well with them.

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      5. That is a cool photo. My parents were complete opposites too. I can’t figure out how they stayed together. I think a friend of my father’s that worked with my mother introduced them, or at least that’s how the family lore goes.

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  2. Thanks again for taking part Max! A great writeup and one that really touched many of us judging from comments on my site. Kudos to your parents for working hard to keep Christmas special for you kids even after they’d split up.

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  6. Oh, lots of memories have been prompted….like when my letter to Santa asked for Alice Cooper’s School’s Out and, well that pair of panties that record came with (I think I was 10)

    Ours was an extended family gathering usually at our place, an relaxed gathering with the aunts, uncles, grandparents at our home Christmas eve, and then Christmas Day evening at my Aunt Mary’s house would be the huge gathering…the memory that comes to mind was opening that front door and a huge cloud of blue smoke would billow out….everyone, except my parents smoked…and they all drank, and drank……..there was always a lot of food, I remember pouring a drink for my uncle bill, something I wasn’t used to, and I poured him a large class of vodka…that he drank, and by the end of the evening he was in a rocking chair trying to rock sideways……there always seemed to be some sort of family argument, but just lots of chatting with family that we’d only see at Christmas which was nice…not all lived here in Edmonton…

    At some point that ended at a family fight when I was in senior high and those type of gatherings never really happened again…and I’ve always missed those family connections and ever since I returned here with my family have tried to mend those bonds, unsuccessfully…..and now most along with my father are gone….at random times I do cross paths with cousins (oddly enough none of us smoke) which is nice but not the same…I remember telling my dad at one point that if they didn’t mend those relations, you know water under the bridge, at some point it would be too late…..and well, now of the 6 of his brothers and sisters, he’s gone, and only one of his sisters is still with is….so when we get together with my children, I remember those times, bring out the old family movies and just remember those good good times…

    and than crank up Christmas Wrapping with Iggy Pop and Kylie Minoque and drink a tumbler of, well wine, I hate vodka

    Merry Christmas

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    1. That is sad when that happens Warren. I was fortunate that there hasn’t been any fights or anything like that. My nephew came in drunk one Christmas Eve but he was happy…he isn’t really a drinker but his work had a party…his wife was embarrased but he was actually funny all night…no trouble.
      Thanks for the memories Warren…and Merry Christmas!

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    2. Warren, this made me laugh out loud:
      “I remember pouring a drink for my uncle bill, something I wasn’t used to, and I poured him a large class of vodka…that he drank, and by the end of the evening he was in a rocking chair trying to rock sideways……”

      So much sorrow could be avoided if these family gatherings didn’t involve alcohol. My family drank like sailors (no offense to sailors) 363 days a year, but two days a year, Eve and Day, nobody drank at the gatherings.

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  8. Christmas = family, the good, the bad and the ugly.

    (Sorry Max, I’ve yet to get my brain back, its trailing along about 6 hours behind me, so I won’t be saying a lot till it catches me up . Good trip, but I remain shattered by let-jag. Errrr, jet-lag.)

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    1. I’m happy that you had a good trip and that you are back. Dave and I emailed each other the other day and we both said we missed you a lot dude. Get some rest and get over that jet lag lol or let jag…it will take a few days!
      Yea you have to take the ugly and learn from it…and the astonishing thing is…my family made the best out of a bad situation.

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      1. Yeah, Christmas comes but once a year and the people who are at odds with one another should put on their big boy/girl pants, stop their year long sniping and let the kids have one magical day. As I get older I’m more of the opinion every family needs that love and understanding once a year. If not, then slap a schmaltzy smile on your face and keep your loud mouth shut, for the kids sake.

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  10. I love this part:
    “Dad would be standing there and telling me he met Santa and helped him unload the sleigh. Ah! That was the reason he stayed at home, to help Santa.”

    You know, Max, a lot of people start on pain killers for good and valid reasons. They really shouldn’t be blamed for getting addicted to them. With all of those kidney stones, what else was he supposed to do. I know you aren’t blaming him. I also don’t blame your mom for not wanting you to see him like that. Brings tears to my eyes just thinking about it. Too many people who trust doctors who are nothing more than legalized pushers.

    The fact that your folks could stay friendly for the holiday even after divorce says a lot about their characters. There are reasons you became the person you are, and your folks helped you build character.

    Thank you for sharing your special reasons for loving the holidays so much. I think it helps you and the rest of your readers in doing so. ❤

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    1. Well thank you for the push….cause it wouldn’t have happened without it.
      Yea Dad carried around a black bag that jingled with pills. I thought every dad had a bag! No I never blamed dad but what pushed mom over the line was the other women…he wasn’t like that before but drugs totally change people.
      He was a good dad though and my mom was a good mom and that is what matters.

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  12. Thanks for sharing and have a Merry Christmas. My sweetheart and I will be alone for Christmas for the first time in our lives. (Kids made other plnas.) It will be sad but we will make the best of it!

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