Alice Cooper – Teenage Frankenstein

Happy Halloween everyone! This song was released in 1986 but the song would have fit well with his seventies output. I heard the song a lot in my area at the time.

The song was on the album Constrictor released in 1986. The song peaked at #80 in the UK. The song was written by Alice Cooper and Kane Roberts.

Alice Cooper’s real name is Vincent Furnier. Alice Cooper was the name of the band, but the name became so associated with the lead singer that he took it.

The band did a good job spreading the rumor that “Alice Cooper” was the name of a girl who was accused of being a witch in the 1600s, saying she contacted them through an Ouija board. Furnier later explained that he made it up when he was thinking of a sweet, innocent-sounding name that would contrast against their shocking stage show.

Cooper ran for President in 2016 with the slogan “A Troubled Man For Troubled Times” which I loved.

Alice Cooper for President

His “platform” were these talking points

  1. Getting Brian Johnson back in AC/DC
  2. A snake in every pot
  3. No more pencils, no more books
  4. Adding Lemmy to Mt Rushmore
  5. Rename Big Ben “Big Lemmy”
  6. Groucho Marx on the $50 bill
  7. Peter Sellers on the £20 note
  8. Cupholders required for every airplane seat
  9. Ban on talking during movies in movie theatres
  10. Ban on taking selfies, except on a designated National Selfie Day

Cooper is a big family man which contradicts his reputation. Cooper is a born-again Christian and believes in the devil enough to have genuine supernatural fear. He’s never taken a satanist stance and warns other bands against it. When he was a kid, his family was poor and there were very few presents. Now, Cooper goes crazy on Christmas, buying lots of gifts for his family.

Alice Cooper:  “When I moved to L.A. with this little wimpy garage band, the first people we met were the Doors. Then we met Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin. All of the people who died of excess were our big brothers and sisters. So I said to myself: How do you become a legend and enjoy it? The answer is to create a character as legendary as those guys and leave that character on the stage.”

Teenaged Frankenstein

I’m the kid on the blockWith my head made of rockAnd I ain’t got nobodyI’m the state of the artGot a brain a la carteI make the babies cry

I ain’t one of the crowdI ain’t one of the guysThey just avoid meThey run and they hideAre my colors too brightAre my eyes set too wide?I spent my whole lifeBurning, turning

I’m a teenage FrankensteinThe local freak with the twisted mindI’m a teenage FrankensteinThese ain’t my handsAnd these legs ain’t mine

Got a synthetic faceGot some scars and a braceMy hands are rough and bloodyI walk into the nightWomen faint at the sightI ain’t no cutie-pie

I can’t walk in the dayI must walk in the nightStay in the shadowsStay out of the lightAre my shoulders too wideIs my head screwed on tight?I spent my whole life burningBurning, turning

I’m a teenage FrankensteinThe local freak with the twisted mindI’m a teenage FrankensteinThese ain’t my handsAnd these legs ain’t mine

Author: Badfinger (Max)

Power Pop fan, Baseball, Beatles, old movies, and tv show fan. Also anything to do with pop culture in the 60s and 70s... I'm also a songwriter, bass and guitar player.

23 thoughts on “Alice Cooper – Teenage Frankenstein”

  1. Constrictor will always be a special Coop album for me as this was my first purchase of an Alice album back in 86 when I was 19. Love Teenage Frankenstein and even though the album sounds like a total 80s album production wise there are a bunch of great tracks..
    The Man Behind The Max!

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  6. Alice and Glen Campbell were great friends: they were both recovering alcoholics and born-again Christians. When Glen died, Alice did an interview with one of their local TV stations (they both lived in Phoenix, I believe) and Alice was as far from his stage persona as you can imagine. That’s the Alice Cooper I admre…

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    1. Oh yea…I’ve seen that exact one I believe. He talked about Glen taking Alice for a ride one time… Glen and Tanya Tucker sure had an unhealthy relationship.

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  7. Not a bad tune. The two Alice Cooper songs I really dig are “School’s Out” and “I’m Eighteen.” I actually got to see him live once in August 2017, together with Edgar Winter and Deep Purple. The latter were the reason I went. I’ve listened to “Machine Head”, which to me still is the ultimate hard rock album, since my early teens and always wanted to see these guys.

    Cooper’s gig was fun. As was Winters. And finally seeing Deep Purple was really cool. Between the three of them, they blew the roof off the place!

    Cooper is an interesting character. While one could consider a stage showing featuring guillotines, electric chairs and other unusual accessories as shall we say a bit unusual, based on interviews I’ve seen, Cooper himself seems to be a pretty down-to-earth and likeable guy. Obviously, his stage show is only that, just show.

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    1. I saw Cooper open up for the Stones in 2006 in Church Hill Downs….he sounded better than the Stones as far as pure sound…he had a better mix and I think his music was more made for that place than the Stones.
      He does seem like a really good guy.

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  8. All his songs would be good Halloween songs aint it? I never heard this one before. Is that his same 80s album with the song Clones? I really like that one. I think it sounds like The Cars.

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    1. I haven’t thought of Clones in years…it’s on the Flush the Fashion album…I can’t believe I remembered that. I looked it up to be sure.

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  9. MI boy! I remember the first time seeing him without his makeup and was disappointed. His songs were popular at just the right time for my teenage years. He was the *first* shock performer I remember. Not sure if he came first or Black Sabbath, but I remember him as first. So interesting to learn his religious background and love the quote about leaving the persona on the stage.

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    1. I love watching interviews with him. Not what you would expect from him…he was good friends with Glen Campbell also… just a down to earth guy that plays a character.
      I think him and Black Sabbath came out around the same time.

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      1. So your sister gave you that single? She was trying to teach you. That song was very important to females at the time, and I love how he acts it out on stage. Next time you talk with your sister, ask her how she feels about it.

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      2. Hmmm give… take… I can’t remember lol. No she would have tracked me down if I took it so yea she probably gave it to me.
        I sure will ask.

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