Groucho had the best one-liners than just about anyone else.
“Please accept my resignation. I don’t care to belong to any club that will have me as a member”
“I was married by a judge… I should have asked for a jury”
“A man’s only as old as the woman he feels”
“As soon as I get through with you, you’ll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife
“I married your mother because I wanted children, imagine my disappointment when you came along”
“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife”
“Women should be obscene not heard”
“Marriage is the chief cause of divorce”
“Marriage is a wonderful institution but who wants to live in an institution?”
“Those are my principles If you don’t like them I have more”
“You’ve got the brain of a four-year-old boy, and I’ll bet he was glad to get rid of it ”
“Who are you going to believe, me or your lyin’ eyes?”
“Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse”
“Remember men, you are fighting for this lady’s honor; which is probably more than she ever did”
“Last night I shot an elephant in my Pajamas and how he got in my pajamas I’ll never know”
“I worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty”
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A brilliant wit! Only person I can think of that is close in number of great one-liners is Oscar Wilde.
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Yes you are right…I should do one on him…
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Haven’t seen enough of the movies…but man, he had a gift for hilarious soundbites
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One of the greats! Many said his “ad-libs” on You Bet Your Life were scripted, and if they were, he certainly made them seem like they were ad-libs!
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One of my comedy heros…along with Harpo, Buster Keaton, and Chaplin.
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Keaton was a master! Chaplin’s Great Dictator remains one of the most underrated performances in film history. Harpo – Amazing! The Marx Brother’s films are some of my favorites!!
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I like all of the Paramount Marx Brothers a lot. Today people don’t know what they are missing.
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I think that’s why I love old comedies so much – they were smart. Think about the Abbott and Costello bit Who’s on First? – perfectly written. The Marx Brothers stuff was also well written. Word Play like “sanity clause” is still funny!
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“If I was standing any closer I would be in back of you”…. Classic lines. I haven’t watched Abbott Costello in a long time…I must do that.
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